Right now as I sit at a table with my Bible, notebook and iced Chai, staring outside the window of my favorite downtown coffee shop, there is so much stirring within my heart that I can feel the hurricane of emotion welling up inside of me as I fight back tears. Thinking about the process of how all this came to both makes me laugh and leaves me with a feeling of nostalgia. Remembering about a couple years ago how the man I serve under as a leader in the youth ministry at my church talked about the next big social networking site called twitter and I swore it sounded like the stupidest thing on earth and how I would never join... and then, a year later, it took joining a worth cause of being on the To Write Love On Her Arms street teams for me to sign up for an account and use it to spread the word. Twitter quickly became what any other blog or social networking site has been for me, which is an opportunity to share the love of Jesus with the world and a witness of what He is doing in my heart. Along with TWLOHA stuff, it got me more involved with the students at The Connection- (youth ministry I work with) and more connected with the people and organizations I left in LA about 3 years ago when I experienced the Missions trip at the Los Angeles Dream Center that changed my life. I started following the move of the Lord at the Pasadena International House of Prayer and that got my heart stirred up for what I got a glimpse of when I took those steps of fate 3 years ago.
I'm realizing now more than ever that those 2 weeks spent seeing God on display in the streets of Los Angeles were never meant for a one time experience. My heart feels somewhat torn by the passion for both my own city and the City of Angels. I feel a shift in my role here at my church and with the relationships I have here, and yet I know that it is not time to leave them behind. I don't feel like I'm really meant to leave this city... but in all honesty- that could very well be my comfort zone speaking. Right now the thought of planning to spend a summer in LA is scary enough without thinking about the possibilities of maybe creating my life and future there someday, as one of my closets friends and mentors has predicted, so I will leave that in the hands of the Lord to lead me where He may in His perfect timing. I know that there is a reason for this passion and this burden on my heart and that all the dreams and desires that the Lord has placed inside of me are for a reason. Every gift He has given me is meant to be used to change the world and I long to see every promise that the Lord has ever given me fulfilled.
I am learning that as the Perfect Father, God's desires are to make our lives more beautiful, more glorious and more blessed than we ever thought possible! I will trust in His plans and wait in His timing for the call that He has placed on my life. Lord, let me live worthy of the calling that you have placed upon me! To you be the praise, honor and glory forever! ♥
